I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
For some reason fuck navy didn't go over quite as well as say fuck michigan;
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
So im on with some ukrainian stripper for a vodka tasting tomorrow. If I die tell my family im awesome
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
Dude. If I met a dinosaur right now. we'd totally be on the same page. Brainwaves and shit.
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
He has no idea I'm scrolling through Instagram while he's going down on me. I'm so bored.
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
i looked at my texts in the morning and saw that i had a full conversation with myself via text thinking it was someone else. i rejected myself
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
Randomize