It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
The bruises are from paintball. The money is from me being awesome
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
He got weirdly turned on by the video of my cat licking nacho cheese off my finger.
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
My theory is if i keep drinking, evolution will kick in and I will grow a bigger, faster, and more improved liver by January.
Randomize
