Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
I can't come tonight. Someone took a shit in the dressing room. A.) Clean it up or B.) Kill myself. Text back with your answer.
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home
I actually just took 17 pictures of some guy at the gas station that needs to marry me now
I have to have sex on a bidet. I'm not sure what kind, but it's reason #4 for an Italian vacation!
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
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