Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
I feel like I got hit by a truck made out of Jack Daniels.
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
Wait, how is it that I'm just getting ready to go out and you're already showing your penis to freshmen girls?
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
She said we should all be mermaids since didn't breathe for 9 months inside our mothers. I want her logic.
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
I fell asleep while eating jimmy johns last night and then woke up at 5am and continued to eat it
If he has a beard, chances are, that’s an open invitation to sit on his face
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
I’m glad they have a happy marriage but why do they have to inflict it on the rest of us?
Randomize
