addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
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He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
Do you think blood ever gets sick of carrying all these drugs around?
Like, there are so many different things we make it do, and it just wants to settle down and be a one-drug fluid?
Stop reading WebMD high.
You came running into my room at 4 in the morning yelling "SANCTUARY!" and flung yourself into bed.
Hmmm, sounds like a Jaeger night then. Did I at least get to be the little spoon?
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He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
I wanna eat mushrooms and cuddle with a million dogs at once. I wanna know what heaven is like
I'm a little concerned about right now. You showed up at my house soaking wet, drunk with a bag of ham and 2 liter of Dr. Pepper, and you refused to tell me where you got the ham until I gave you some more liquor.
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
Some guy at the bar last night bought us Arrowhead water and I was so drunk, it tasted good
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
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