I'm really into asian looking animals
and i looked up. we had an audience...
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
Woke up with 3 sports bras for underwear. Valiant effort drunk me.
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
This is the point in ur life where u should realize there's nothing left but a spiral of shame
I should but I don't. All I see is an escalator of success
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
shes making a cheerios necklace using dental floss 'just in case' she gets the munchies later
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
he threw an umbrella that he ripped out of the table at the fence like he was harpooning a whale while the owner of the bar was outside then tried to blame it on an old man...
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
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