So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
Note to self: Don't teach the naked lap rule in beer pong until after youve made a cup..
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
Well i'm not entirely sure considering he gave my vagina an early valentine's day card that said "you're purrfect."
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
Yeah she let me pull the goalie and wear my USA flag like a cape since it was the first day of the world cup
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
First you stole a hockey stick out of the nieghbors yard and claimed you were moses leading his children home. Then you led us around the same block twice before I called the cab
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
His wife isn’t coming to the wedding! I’ve got 48 hours to home wreck him. Gotta go, I have to shave my vajayjay and buy some really slutty underwear. Love you!
I forget how to act sober
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
Randomize
