I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
I'm outside your house...sorry I feel like I don't need formal invites anymore.
a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
I think he just gave me the 'I used to fuck your sister' discount
You know why I moved here? No public intoxication law. A cop just helped me from my bent over vomit pose, asked if I was ok, and gave me a ride home.
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
It must be illegal for me to be this drunk in front of this many children
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
You slammed your forties down on the table and yelled "I AM EDWARD FORTYHANDS" then mumbled something about repping Idaho like a champ and laid down on the couch.
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
She moved all of her stuff out while we were gone. Shit in the toilet, and didn’t flush. So yeah it went well.
I'll start cleaning the house tonight darlin. So you don't have to fuck your two boytoys in the driveway the next two days.
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
Randomize