Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
i just renamed my vag "the sorting hat"
I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
Me either. I want to get 'chase a stray cat through the neighborhood in my hooker heels' drunk. And it's your birthday, so you have to get 'best friend holding your hair while you puke in the bar bathroom and cry about your life' drunk. In a feather boa.
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
I just went into a strangers house to have a spoonful of sugar to cure my hiccups, wtf is wrong with me
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
I never thought people would keep their guns next to their fake plastic penises, but there they were.
He stopped his car in the middle of ongoing traffic to ask me to marry him. Then he got pulled over. Yeah I'd say the slutty Dallas Cowboys costume was a success.
Your hotness may or may not have landed him in jail.
i regret nothing
brb throwing up in the dishwasher
i regret everything
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
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