Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
Places you have drunkenly threatened to piss: my bed, my bros bed, my moms bed, my bros wedding
Does making ice cubes at 4 in the morning count as being productive?
Fuck you, jack daniels. I feel like satan laid an egg in my brain.
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
Turns out floaties are a great thing after a couple bottles of vodka
After I came she just held my balls until I fell asleep. It was like adult swaddling. Magical...
I cant see straight, her clothes are all over my floor and I'm covered in bite marks... No I will not go to brunch with you
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
Someone signed my nipple.
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Randomize
