I'm drinking with 3 chicks and 1 gay dude. 100% chance I'm getting laid and 75% chance I'll enjoy it.
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
Regular drunk falling on flat ground did not prepare me for drunk falling into a pile of firewood.
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
Why do I have a vague memory of your entire fraternity climbing in through my bedroom window?
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
holy shit! you were walking down a hill and just happened to be passing a trash can like 4 ft away and projectile vomited over a fence into the trash can. kept walking and drank a beer.
Randomize
