Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
You wouldn't let me clean the puke off your face because I'd mess up your cat whiskers. Now that's dedication.
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How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
Driving a mountain pass in the middle of a blizzard with the worst vodka gummybear hangover ever is gods way of telling me to keep the black-outing within a 15 mile radius to my house.
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
Your lack of enthusiasm for my exciting news of drunken debauchery with an otherwise occupied vagina of one of my greatest conquests yet disturbs me. I'm not happy with you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
I wish I was there to have sex with you on the plane to lessen your anxiety.
That's the nicest thing anyone has over said to you.
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
Everything is fine, it's not hung over in here at all\n\n*Narrator* *but in fact everything was not fine*
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
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