He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
I saw a girl walking around campus with bandages on both her knees. I need to get her number.
I just don't see what's wrong with carrying a water bottle around.
It's not the bottle. It's the fact that you're drinking wine out of a sport bottle at 9 am.
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
He skipped an important family function with his dying father to fuck me. Terrible human, amazing fuck buddy.
I am serious when I say I think I broke a rib having sex with Kyle. It might be puncturing my lung. No lie. I might die today.
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
I just want you to know you're the worst sister ever.
If this is about me and your ex, it's not my fault she doesn't like men.
I just got a text from a stranger offering to shave my asshole. I've been sober and out of town for a week, are you using my number as a dial-a-dumping again?
Randomize
