if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
Listen, Pinot Grigio got me pregnant. It can get you a boyfriend.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
she crawled under her car and passed out. Unfortunately her feet were sticking out and someone called 911 because they thought she had been run over.
Maybe tomorrow I'll be drunk again and can provide you with texts at a more reasonable hour. Here's hoping. GOodnight. Tebow loves you
theres 2 cans of open Campbell's soup on the counter and a note that says "guess which one is puke" ... want lunch?
I swear the crows are laughing at me.
You my friend are stoned into submission
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
You don't know reunion panic until you've exfoliated your butt cheeks.
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
He asked me to fly out to Seattle to participate in a week of marathon sex so I'm at the airport now. I'll call you when I get back.
Turns out the grown up version of seeing your teacher shopping is seeing your therapist is on tinder
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
Randomize
