I was actually kinda bummed my STD test came back negative.
That would have been proof he'd slept with the stripper. Lame.
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
so the plumber came, he found condoms, feathers and glitter in the pipes.
He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
The night was going well until I found tufts of my hair in the freezer. Then I got nervous
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
So, last night I fell asleep sitting Indian-style on the floor, propped up against the front of the couch with an empty wine bottle in between my legs... How was your night?
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
Randomize
