Omfg I am plowed. Had drinks with 3 milfs. Going out on their boat tomorrow. They want to show me how buoyant they are.
I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
I just recorded courtney puking and set it as my ringtone.
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
Standing here wondering if its a good idea to cook pork chops in the toaster or not.
After sex he just told me I'm definitely pregnant and it's a girl. Should I run?
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
Randomize