New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
I spent most of the night trying to drink out of three bottles of beer at once. I don't have to be told the reasons I'm single
Oh my god i hate key west. No one takes amex and strippers took all my money
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
Wandering around the streets of Baltimore at two in the afternoon. Just offered a job as a stripper. Think I should accept?
Try an internship first, see if you enjoy it.
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
Randomize
