I CAN MOONWALK!
I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
we need to go to the store. i'm tired of having bud light for breakfast.
do you want me to pick up budweiser instead?
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
He turned me down because he was still doing his taxes.
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
I mean she's doing calculus in her head to prove how NOT drunk she is.
Randomize
