Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
we sat in the hammock and pretended we were skydiving for three hours. jack actually started crying when i convinced him his chute didnt open.
Oh btw, my mom called... you made the police blotter in the newspaper. Don't worry, she's mailng me a copy so I can put in on the fridge.
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
You're gonna die alone anyway. Even if you do meet a man, they die earlier than women. Best case, you have to deal with grieving over his death and then die alone a couple years later. Worst case, you get a terminal illness and he divorces you, leaving you to die alone anyway.
Thanks, mom.
Note to self: Do not bring gift bag with cock ring inside to family Christmas. Leave to unwrap at home.
Whoever owns the butter that i always steal out of the office fridge definitely put THC butter in there this time. Shit just got real.
Just high enough for therapy.
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
His status said "sad." of course I liked it. I don't even care that I was the only one. Facebook isn't your god damn journal, we don't care about your problems.
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
I told him to send me a dick snap for my birthday. To personalize it, he drew a candle coming out of the tip of it so I could blow it out.
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
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