I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
Made a salesman quit his job, a saleswoman cry, and got a manager to half shout "fuck this"....successful drunk Christmas shopping
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
He came in both my eyes, then refused to give me a towel unless I found him by playing Marco Polo
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
He will forever be known as the toe sucker who may or may not have been a father
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
Randomize
