Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
It was confusing and full of hummus
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
Blonde 1 is sitting on the floor crying and blonde 2 is asleep with her face in the toilet. This isn't what I had in mind when they asked me back
no seriously, she's legit pissed i'm late to lunch because i was watching full house. there's obviously no future here.
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
DRUNK CANOEING
Please text me if you survive.
LAND HO BITCH
Definitely just put my car on cruise control so I could stick my head out of the sunroof while driving to taco bell.
I tried to break it off with the married one. He offered to pay off my car.
The side bitch struggle is real.
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
There's a cute bearded guy at this brew fest wearing a kilt and selling mead
TELL HIM ABOUT MY DOWRY!!!
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
Randomize
