You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
I'm gonna put my relationship status as "widowed" to see if it helps me get some poon.
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
So doing the math I dated almost 2 of me in penises. Like, if I you layed them out lengthwise it would be 2 times my height.
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
i am no longer ashamed when i walk into the dining hall for sunday brunch and i'm greeted with applause for suriving my weekend
Ik youre sleeping but fyi its 5:32am I'm sitting in the middle of the road bra less and shoeless with boxers in my hand and no ride. Shits real crazy.
Randomize
