She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
I promise a much better performance tomorrow than last night my penis has a bed time
It's christmas eve and my mom blacked out before me. If she beat me at that, what have I been learning at college?
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
Drunk me wrote a bucket list last night. #4 is "hate fuck a childhood enemy". Can we make this happen?
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
Dude, I'm pretty sure I just drank iced tea last night and yet I'm still hungover. What the fuck is my body anymore ?
Randomize
