Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
Tell her she's as useless as a condom.
don't thank me. stop putting your penis in foreign objects.
they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
so i just drove past a racoon and a kid on a long board... god i love 4am white castle runs
you just kept bragging about how there was a "pretty large" chance that you had pooped on the same toilet as George Clooney
Don't try to dry clothes in the microwave. They'll catch on fire.
I knew you would eventually ask my secret. Pedialite mix drinks. Works wonders.
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
Randomize
