i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
According to my dad, my tongue ring makes people assume I give a lot of blow jobs because, as stated by him "that's what it's for"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
Just tapped my penis on the head and said "this will be your year buddy."
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
I just found two ugly toothless rednecks fucking in the woods in my backyard. The man shouted at me close the door your letting the stank out which made no sense to me cuz we where outside. Whatever. just another Monday in the Northwoods.
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
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