these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
sober me hid the cigs from drunk me. sober me is a tricky bitch.
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
I just found like 5 packs of sparklers. If someone doesn't get set on fire tonight I am retiring from party hosting.
Chef at hibachi place learned it was my bday and sprayed 20 second count worth of saki in my mouth. Not sure it was the right image to share with my kids, but thought you'd be proud.
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
The sweaty, naked apartment dance party wasn't complete until I threw the whole jar of glitter on us. It was like the icing.
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
Adding to the list of things I have said out loud at the bar that I shouldn't have: "I am the yoda of sucking dick"
What the hell happened to the sandwich meat I just bought?
After you smoked, you made 8 ham sandwiches.
Guess that explains the mysterious disappearance of the bread...
Did you come home, throw out a ton of shoes, then leave again?
That is exactly what I did.
All I remember is you shouting "THIS KID IS A FREAKIN' NINJA!!" when he dive rolled over a barbed wire fence and proceeded to ask for his 18th beer.
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
Randomize
