I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
someone left their shoes, a resume, and a pizza in the shower... i am actually speechless
For once I'd like to have a Taco Sunday without having some random drunk chick flee my house half naked and in tears.
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
It was worse than that time I did shots of BBQ sauce and pierced my own ear with a thumbtack
So I'm drinking wine and watching Thumbelina
I'm teaching my cat to play fetch
Yep, it's a friday
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
No ambien sex tonight. I just ate two hotdogs with chilli and onions.
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
Randomize
