that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
you're putting all your eggs in a very hungover basket
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
bubblegum was invented today. we're getting drunk. end of story.
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
What did you wear last night? Because I'm pretty sure there are atleast 4 Facebook statuses about your walk of shame.
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And if I don't get arrested for drinking and canoeing over the next 3 days, this hurricane will not have turned out anywhere near as well as I planned
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
I got stabbed with a couple of chip crumbs during sex Saturday. Further proof I need to stop eating snacks in bed
i shit you not. the flight is delayed because they have to change fucking light bulb. all the airport bars are closed and my shit is in checked luggage.
Just because you haven’t had your UTI yet doesn’t mean you have a right to talk like Yoda
Randomize