During sex he started singing that song in Forgetting Sarah Marshall--"Inside of You"--by Russell Brand
So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
i just walked downstairs to find my brother wearing a crossingguards vest and boxers. when i asked him where he got it he just looked at me, smiled, and kept feeding the dog yogurt
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
STDs are my biggest fear, besides whales. They're so fucking big.
Figured out how I got so much alcohol in my hair: tried to drink my drink using my cleavage as a cup holder. Missed my drink hole and got it all in my hair
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
I couldn't figure out what was more important, finishing the shot or putting out the fire on my leg.
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
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