Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
They should really pass out barf bags in church
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
The cops forgot your handle of tequila when they took you away. Taking shots in your honor amigo
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So this 40 year old woman was trying to bring me into the bathroom to blow me and the bartender called the cops on her because she was showing her tits. Only in asbury.
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
Dinner at my parents is vodka, lemonade, cheese ad crackers. Why would I leave?
After I'd been making out with her for a good 15 minutes some guy yelled "grab this chicks beer she needs both hands!" And he was right I did need both: god bless jello wrestling.
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
Every time our eyes meet, I silently summon him to my vagina.
Man I just realized that my only life problem right now is that I have to convince myself not to fuck a 19-y-o
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