Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
maybe i'll make good life choices and keep my legs closed. periodically txt me friday and saturday night saying "baby carrot round 2" that should stop me.
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
I feel like a pet sloth would complement my lifestyle.
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
I apparently pulled his dick out at the bar and started yelling "DICK PICS IN REAL LIFE!"
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
I made a bucket list last night. Number 5: Will marry a wizard.
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
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