Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
I have my ice chest next to my bed. Instead of breakfast in bed, its beers in bed. 10x better
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
I dislocated my rib eating pizza. I think I am broken.
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
Half the people who compete die. All the rest either lose their minds or grow an innate fear of sharks, vodka, and fishbowls
Come over. We have tacos... And girls who took their clothes off. But mainly, tacos.
There's a ton of international students in my suite and I'm just sitting in this chair with no pants on eating frosted flakes
I had a drinkin contest with a person that didnt exsist, fuck withdrawl day
Hold on are you sure that we dont have another roommate?
Yes.
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
I'm drunk doing an ab workout. I can only hope I make it to bed tonight.
I just had sex with a man wearing a Darth Vader helmet....he pressed the voice button the whole time that said "I am your father". I don't think I can ever come back from this
Randomize
