Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
you puked in the cab and all over yourself and tried to convince the cabby it was there already when he got upset... then you puked again. not too convincing are you
What's the point in getting all dressed up and going when i'm just gonna throw up on myself by midnight?
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
I'm driving to work hungover. I feel like I got hit by a train and then drank that train too.
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
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