Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
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Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
Gas station champagne. And before you say anything I'll have you know it's imported. From California. So get fucked.
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
The closest I'll come to committing is leaving sex toys at their house
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why let a Christmas Eve hangover ruin a perfectly good Christmas Day acid trip?
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
Also, next time I go get a wax, I'm gonna ask the girl about the innie to outie ratio she sees on the daily.
How have you been? I haven’t talked to you since you dyed your pubes.
My hands smell like penis... I can't even remember the last time i touched a penis, but my hands say i did. Oh the mystery.
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
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