he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
I demand visitation hours with the duck.
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
Holy shit, you lost your virginity on 11/11/11. Now every time someone fucks you, they can make a wish. Your vagina has officially been transformed into a wishing well.
I forgot if I was chewing my gum or my tongue
Ps I got my nipple pierced. You're just gonna have to accept me for the tool I am and I don't wanna hear any shenanigans.
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
Look, all I can tell ya is I want to drink wine out of a bottle while you eat me. It would be the most fantastic end to finals week. Maybe ever.
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
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