so my bro's bff came over...we had an awkward "yeah we fucked and can fuck later, but let's just pretend it didn't happen in front of the family" hug.
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
he just payed for our date, after telling him I was leaving early to meet my fuck buddy. is there something lower than friendzone I can stick this guy in?
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
he ran through my sliding door
in his defense that door gets complicated after 10 beers
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
Dude you were so wasted you thought a fake electric candle was real and tried to light your cig with it. Multiple times.
i woke up wearing a life jacket, holding on to a footlong hotdog, and had on a mr. hustle 1995 shirt on
good night
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
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