i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
If i'm not hungover, near death, and wondering what i did the night before on Monday, life is not worth living.
You brought back some girl with you at 3am and introduced her to everyone as "hot pocket"
I've had enough of this chick, she wanted to cuddle after giving me a handjob. I feel like I'm in junior high
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
Just drove past the dude that came in your sock
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
They are going to name an STD after you.
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
I swear to god, I'm like....the Jedi master of dick.
Randomize
