he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
He booked his flight from Dallas already, no ticket to the game, said hes gonna bang some girl at tailgait to get a ticket, I had to explain that it will be sub 20 degrees F during tailgate, he decided to come in july instead, Texans are dumb.
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
There's a very real possibility that I'll wake up in your uncle's driveway.
I sang again at the bar lastnight I don't think alanis morrset knew when she wrote you outta know that the drunk version was going to be go fuck yourself Josh and Chelsea. I love $2 wells.
It was insane. I was drunk for 11 consecutive hours. I woke up covered in almonds and there were footprints all over my shirt
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
you missed a good time last night.
you texted me at 10 telling me to come fuck you, that says enough.
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