I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
The girl with a dislocated arm just did an assisted keg stand. You will never have an excuse again.
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
Randomize
