i'm not a human right now. not even a dancer.
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
I forgot to tell you. Your neighbor was walking his tiny dog and saw me crawl out of my jeep drunk vomiting and holding onto my bumper. He just said: morning! all friendly.
Meanwhile she's getting her law degree and I'm dropping Cool Ranch Doritos down my bra because I'm laying down eating on the couch
why do you keep saying "she looks like a porn star" like thats a bad thing?
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
Because I'm sitting in a bath of my own wisdom and drowning my sorrows in coconut rum
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
Such a big mess for such a small penis
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone dad. And you’re also like a second dad to me who I also send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
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