Where are you? I just made a vodka + cranberry & I’m going to drive there & throw it in your face
New plan, instead of sleeping with her, I'm just going to use her to sleep with the entire sorority.
Why wouldn't u just let me ride the washing machine
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
When a chinchilla decides to sit on your face while you're getting head from its owner, you bond.
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
After the keg stand you collapsed, hit your head on the floor, started seizing and after 20 seconds got back up and said "hah, I remember my first beer"
Let's knock shit down like godzilla and have intense sex in the rubble
I'm high. ignore me
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
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