; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
Just ate lunch with a paperclip again. Seriously, need to invest in plastic forks.
i decided to cut a 3rd hole in to my snuggie so i could masturbate all the time.. all time low? or genius?
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
I can hear my liver begging me not to go out tonight
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
I currently don't understand fingers.
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