I just woke up and i'm wearing a cape and it says sup slut on my ass
everything was goin great until he pulled out his ed hardy lighter and smoked in my face like he was cool.
it's like you attract all the douchebags that nobody wants. people should thank you.
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
If I don't end up being a booty call for Valentine's Day, you wanna go to the movies?
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
I'm pretty sure at any given moment you could wring out my liver and get a couple of shots of jäger.
Like, yea, let's talk sexy but also...LOOK! I SAW A CAT!
We got caught fucking on the couch while I was in my Godzilla onesie.
I just told my mormon professor that I was late because I was getting a STD test... good start to the day.
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