she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
I did the walk of shame to church this morning.
hooker boots and all?
Yep. People looked at me like I was the prodigal daughter returning home. Full of sins but welcome anyway.
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
I feel like every time I get the courage to masturbate to a guy from Game of Thrones, they kill him off.
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
There's a dryer on fire at the laundromat, and everyone's just standing around taking pictures. Except me. I'm texting.
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
I just split a tacobell party box with my boss. 12 tacos. We were equals for a moment.
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
Randomize
