Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
Also, just had a student offer to sell me Xanax. Want some? Just for like a rainy day. Or our memorial day shitshow. Or just another Wednesday night.
I've had balls on my face twice in last 48 hours and I STILL haven't got laid!
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
We can use the Mac n cheese as the potatoes in our breakfast burritos. Problem solved.
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
Randomize
