He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
GOING OUT OF BUSINESS: we're having a foreclosure party tonight...We'll also be raffling off a washer/dryer, microwave and a white tiger head.
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
Let's go get our ovaries removed together. It'll be like bonding by getting mani/pedis, but with more vicodin and less unwanted pregnancies.
You know when you can feel the alcohol in your toes? That's a great feeling.
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
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