I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
Just spent a extra 20 minutes on the phone with the lady from unemployment talking about how to make the best brownies.
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
Cry into your wine glass and then drink the tears, it's like the fountain of youth
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
Dude, did you know, your blood is contaminated with over 17 non-beer fluids?
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
I think one of my ovaries is committing suicide. But that is a topic for another day.
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
And it only took a fake engagement ring, a condom and a bowl of weed
How do I tell my boss I have slutty fantasies about him, me and his conference room table?
Randomize
