Ugh I just know that when I take off his pants his underwear will have Megan's Law written all over them.
Update: no underwear. Greeeeen light.
It made me feel like I need a reality show of my life so I could go back and watch the episodes to figure out how I got from the trunk of the car to my neighbors tree house...
he just flicked a booger into my mouth and shouted "goaaaal!"
smell my finger.
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he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
So after tequila Thursday, Jess broke her arm table dancing. Now her and Andrew look like the perfect drunk couple, matching casts and all.
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
Moral of the story: don't have drunken shower sex with the lights off...or you WILL break your foot. And the shower knobs.
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thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
Maybe he injected his testicle?
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
Almost gave myself a concussion stealing a stuffed unicorn hanging on a street sign but hey I got home safe
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