so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
I told my new friends about my possible new chin. They said I should get my nose done first. Please tell me I'm pretty or something.
I'm a fake celebrity on twitter. I need a life.
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
I swear to god, if you fuck the hot one you're paying me back for the shot I just bought her
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
to have them in my mouth would be like meeting a unicorn while floating on a cloud of glitter
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
My law teacher drew an elephant on the board in class. I was so high that I laughed for 5 minutes straight. Nobody else laughed and everyone stared. 130 people knew I was high.
Randomize
