I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
I don't wanna do a drive in or see a movie tonight. I wanna play some Golden Tee and butt fuck a girl in the bathroom of some bar and proceed with Golden Tee
she kept yelling 'call me bella'
I am not old enough to be running into past fucks at the bank. This is at least a twenty five year old milestone.
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
This is a pre-sorry for hitting on and then sleeping with you're ex
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
They are fixing my bike for free, trying to smoke me out, and their kids keep hugging me.
Congratulations, you have turned my vagina into a garden hose.
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
I just compared my relationship to that double ended dong scene from Requiem. This day just took a turn.
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
Randomize
